I wanna be!

I wanna be fearless. Nothing to block me down. But why when so close to God I still have fears? Where do they come from? Other than the obvious fear of heights? Or bugs? I don’t get it!

3 thoughts on “I wanna be!

  1. fear is a tricky beast that comes in many forms often stopping us from moving forward.

    sometimes it’s the outside voice, the kid gets told they’ll never ride a bike. fear rules them and never even consider riding a bike when they probably have the capability.

    sometimes it’s doubt that turns to fear. i had doubts heading into college and each new class. often times that doubt turned to fear, afraid that i had over step my bounds.

    then there’s the fear of trying something new. face it, astronauts sit on top of a controlled explosion. that would scare the bejezus out of me. to get to orbit or get to the moon, that’s what they had to do.

    there’s many other types of fear, i’m sure. no matter what, their are two ways of letting go of fear, deciding not to face it or deciding to face it and working it through.

    i have shaky hands. always had. it don’t fear becoming a brain surgeon because because of that. i gave up that goal and i’ve left the thought of ever being a brain surgeon long ago. that choice doesn’t rule me which leaves the fear behind.

    what do the new bike rider, me at school, an the astronaut have in common? all of those fears can be beaten.

    the kid, who says, screw it. i’m going to get a good teacher. they learn to ride a bike. they may skin a knee or elbow, but the bike becomes a friend. in facing their fears, they learned their fears were unfounded.

    for me, it was putting that first doubt out of my mind, and seeing i wasn’t in over my head. i had drop out of a class or two, but by facing that doubt or fear, i learned the fear was unfounded.

    the astronaut make the decision to sit on the top of his stick of dynamite.he probably never puts his fear away. by facing his fear, he can move forward.

    that in between state, between letting go or going forward is where the problems arises. we spend time wondering if we should “do it” or not “do it”. each time we fret the decision, the fear builds. and when the fear becomes to much, it can ever become paralyzing.

    so in the words of yoda, “either do or not do.” that in between state such. so simple yet so hard.

    (sorry for the novel)

    Liked by 1 person

  2. It’s a lot of work. But fun work. Because as you read the Scriptures and draw closer to God, you gain peace that passes all understanding. And joy that you never knew you had. I chronicle my fear that came about from my diagnosis with multiple sclerosis in my book called Fearless. I have been a Christian for a long time, but this diagnosis sent me into a tailspin. I really had to dig deep and find out that I really did have the faith and the love and the joy and the peace to work through the grief and find victory again!


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